Happy birthday to me

So this birthday isn't panning out the way I'd like.

Yesterday I spent the day doing laundry and pretty much relaxing while I planned our trip to OCMD for the 4th of July festivities. Something I look forward to each year. Holden was scheduled to see his orthopedist yesterday, so Parker and I decided that we would leave for the beach today, instead of try to rush pack and sit in 6 hours of traffic with 2 potty trained 3 year olds.
HIP's Dr's appointment was okay. Dr. Mazer put a shoulder harness on Holden to hold his shoulders in place while his collarbone tries to build up scar tissue ... to hold the bone still. See, HIP's collarbone actually moves now. Push on your collarbone right now... it doesn't move does it? Holden's wiggles all over the place when you push on it. The issue here is that there is a major artery behind this bone that if touched by a moving collar bone, will cause 1 of 2 things: a stroke or a heart attack. 2 things everyone wants to hear when they are at the doctor's office waiting to hear the typical " let's just watch this." I left the appointment feeling okay about HIP's treatment. I called Parker who immediately got angry that I didn't get a second opinion before putting a harness ( that has to stay in place for a week) on the boy... if a harness wasn't the treatment a PEDIATRIC orthopedist would recommend. Being that I am not confrontational... I don't know how to get a second opinion... since Dr. Mazer is " studying" HIP's x-rays. I'm afraid to say " I need those films... so I can go ask someone who knows what the he!# they are talking about." Parker on the other hand seems to think that I " don't care" about the boy's care... so I settled for this treatment option. In Parker's defense, I did tell him that I would call a different Orthopedist... I just never got around to it.. and now it's too late.. the kid is being treated. I just hate to queston authority. I know. Don't go there.. it's just how I am: blinded by trust. I mean, if the guy wanted to challenge me on a glaze recipe for a nice sky blue engobe, or how much grog I would put in a sculpture stoneware body.. by all means: bring it on! Treatment for my son's rare injury ( so rare this doctor has never seen it in a child) I'm not going to argue. Parker is right for wanting a second opinion. I just wish with every cell in my body that he wouldn't say " you don't care" because he couldn't be farther away from the truth. I know he is frustrated with me, but the way he is handling himself hurts my feelings.

The kid's wanted a snack.. .and I wanted to look for a new table for the deck ( since the wind blew over our glass one last week) so, I decided to stop off @ Target. While sitting in the Pizza hut/Taco Bell/miscellaneous snack bar ( a place that skeeves me out) Parker called me to reem( sp?) me out again for not getting a second opinion. I told him I understood, but I was backed into a corner @ this point. I gave him Dr. Gober's ( the world's most awesome/old school pediatrician) #, so he couldspeak to someone for himself. Millie had to go potty. We all went potty, but for me it wasn't as exciting... because again, my underware was filled with blood. Yes people, it was 5:45 on a friday evening. The blood was " old blood" but there was tons of it. I rushed the kids to the car w/ the happiest face I could muster, and put a call into Dr. Landy ( perinatologist) She called back almost immediately. While the kids SCREAMED the alphabet song, she explained that my sonogram a few days ago showed no stress on the baby, and this was most likely cause by the old hemmorhage from implantation. She told me that it would be okay to travel, but I was putting myself @ the mercy of the OCMD area hospitals. She told me to just see how I did over night. If I had any more bleeding, cramping, or dizziness, probably I needed to stay home, in case she needed to see me. Welp, guess who is still bleeding, almost fainted last night, and currently has lower abdominal cramps? Yep.. it's me, the birthday girl. I'm not sure I should travel this weekend. I know Parker is going to be so upset. I guess he could take the kids to see his Parents, & I could stay here. I know he needs to see his parents, they get so excited to see MS & HIP. I also know they would be so upset if I cancelled for a mysterious reason. ( they don't know about "Tiny Parker" yet) I don't know what is going to happen here. But I do know this: it's only 8 am.. and my birthday already sucks.